I’m coming to you today with a ninja tip that takes just two seconds but can dramatically shift your relationship with your son. So many of my clients struggle when their boys are moody, prickly, or giving them attitude, and they’re not sure how to break through that wall.
Stay ’till the end if you’re interested in joining our next Book Club+ discussion about raising boys in today’s world!
Tip #1: Ask “Are You Mad at Me?” to Clear the Air
Have you ever noticed a moment when your child is in a bad mood, giving you attitude, or otherwise being prickly, and you’re not sure what’s going on?
Here’s what I do: I simply ask, “Are you mad at me?”
This is a two-second tip. Super easy to implement and very impactful.
Why This Works
No matter how your child responds, you’ll get important information:
- If they say “No”: Great! You’ll know their mood isn’t personal to you, and you can offer support for whatever is actually bothering them.
- If they say “Yes”: Great! Now you know it’s time for a little cleanup.
Remember my mantra: Prioritize your relationship over being right.
The Power of This Question
I love this level of transparency. It’s an invitation to repair the relationship if your child is carrying a grudge, OR it’s an opportunity to offer them some compassion around whatever is bothering them.
This simple question creates space for:
- Relationship repair when there’s distance between you
- Showing your son that you care about his feelings
- Modeling healthy communication about emotions
- Building trust through vulnerability
The way you communicate with your child now is the way they will someday communicate with their own partner, kids, and everyone else in their life. Healthy communication leads to healthy, lifelong relationships. The approach you take now matters more than you know.
What Not to Do:
- Don’t assume you know what’s wrong
- Don’t take their attitude personally before asking
- Don’t avoid the conversation because it feels uncomfortable
I’d love to know what you think. Have you tried this approach? Or are you ready to give it a shot?
Tip #2: Boy Mom Book Club+ – Understanding Today’s Impossible Masculinity
Do you find yourself wondering, “How do I help my son navigate boyhood in today’s world?” when messages about masculinity seem confusing, contradictory, or just plain impossible?
If you’re in The Boy Mom Academy, then you know we get together to discuss books relevant to raising boys. Next month (December, 2025), we’re reading a book called Boy Mom.
When I first led a book group on this topic, the moms ended up with 3 different books by the same name! I’m sure they’re all interesting, but we’re focusing next month on Boy Mom: Reimagining Boyhood in the Age of Impossible Masculinity by Ruth Whippman.
Why This Book Matters
I loved every word of it. Some parts were hard to read, so much so that a few moms I know needed assurance that it ended well before they could continue.
The book tackles the real challenges our sons face growing up in a world where expectations about masculinity pull them in every direction.
I’m particularly excited because I’m seeing Ruth Whippman speak next week, and I can’t wait to bring those insights to our discussion.
The Key Takeaway
Understanding the pressures and impossible standards our boys face helps us:
- Support them without adding to the confusion
- Create space for them to be themselves
- Build their confidence in who they are, not who the world says they should be
- Give them language to navigate complex expectations
This conversation matters more than ever. The way we help our sons understand masculinity now will shape how they see themselves and treat others for the rest of their lives.
Can’t Read the Full Book? No Problem!
As always, if you don’t have time to read the book, I’m providing a podcast, article, and video for you to check out so you can join the discussion.
Book Club+ Discussion Details:
- Book: Boy Mom: Reimagining Boyhood in the Age of Impossible Masculinity
- Date: December 11th, 2025
- Time: 12pm Pacific
- Where: Inside The Boy Mom Academy
I hope to see you there!
P.S. For Therapists and Clinicians
If you’re a therapist or clinician working with parents, consider hopping into my next adventure: The Therapist’s Guide to Parent Coaching. Click here to check out our 4-week pilot program. Space is limited!
Struggling with a moody son or wondering how to help him navigate boyhood? Let me know what’s going on. I’m here to help!