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Writer's pictureRachel Sklar

Are you doing it right?

One of the “Living Systems Principals” I learned at the Parent Coaching Institute is “What you focus on grows.”

In fact, we have a system in our brain that helps us filter out unimportant stuff and pay attention to the things that matter. Without it, we’d be overwhelmed by all the data coming in. That’s why focusing on something makes you notice more of it in your life. It’s also why I start many of my client sessions by asking for “Wins.”

So why not train this system in our favor.

The image features a bold statement in large text that reads, "I'm actually really f**ing amazing!" with "Rachel Sklar" credited below in orange. In the bottom right corner, a small "sklar parenting" logo appears, all set against a light gray background with minimalist styling.

Let’s focus on:

  • Things we’re doing well as moms right now.

  • The incredible accomplishments we’ve made in raising our kids so far.

  • Our commitments to our family’s future.

Let’s NOT focus on:

  • All that other garbage that makes us feel sh*tty (e.g., comparing ourselves to other moms and wondering if we measure up).


Remember, NO ONE is perfect, and we all have our moments of doubt. But in those moments, we can intentionally shift our focus to the things we want to see more of in our lives.

I encourage you to acknowledge the amazing things you are doing well as a parent.

Celebrate your wins, big or small.


Tell yourself today: “I’m actually really f**ing amazing!


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